Shocking and Malicious Distortion of Classic Literature #2

Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters. Oh, creatures of the deep, slay me before I read the first word and save me from my misery.

Oh, wait. I don't have to read it! Never mind.

There should be a law against tacking Jane Austen's name onto any contortion of her writing.

All that is needed now is a very elaborate eye-roll and a disgusted sigh.

~Lizzie

Humph.

Well, I had something I was going to write about. And I can't remember what it was, and I asked Sarah (because she was there when I decided to write about whatever it was) and she said that she can't remember either, but whatever it was, it was boring. *pouts*

Ah! I just thought of something to rant about. First, look at this link (Warning: creepy and gross): Link... Have you looked? Don't read on until you looked and really studied the picture. And read the description. That's important too. If you're still reading and you thought you could get away without looking at the article, you were wrong!

Okay, everyone read it now? And looked at the picture? Good.

Oh, MY, GOSH!!!! That has GOT to be the WORST book to ever be written! Quick, enjoy the last month and a half before publication, when life as we know it will suddenly become 10 times worse! AHHHHH!!!!! It's sacrilege! It's indescribably awful! How can you combine ZOMBIES, of all the most childish, stupid, horrific and idiotic fantastical creatures, with something as classic, genteel, well-written and beyond amazing as Pride and Prejudice? It's malicious! Ooooh. *shudders*

I'm so disgusted.

~Lizzie

Mansfield Park...s. All of them.

I have now seen all three versions of Mansfield Park, and having also read the book, I am qualified in my opinion of the book having never been done anything close to justice in movie form. The version that came closest is fairly old, with bad coloring, horribly unattractive characters and a Fanny that rather annoyed me. Then there was the newest version aired on TV with slightly more attractive actors and actresses, but not as close to the book as the old version (which, despite it's other faults, was certainly diligent in following Jane Austen's storyline). And then there's the version we just watched tonight. Besides the fact that I have a lingering annoyance for Frances O'Connor from her performance in "The Importance of Being Earnest," the screen writer managed to mutilate Fanny's character enough by herself. Not to mention obviously being a feminist and mutilating the entire movie.

I wish Andrew Davies would do a Mansfield Park. He's done my favorite versions of "Sense and Sensibility," and "Pride and Prejudice," and I really liked "Northanger Abbey," "Bleak House," "Wives and Daughters," and "Emma." (Although my favorite version of "Emma" is still the one with Gwyneth Paltrow.) If only he would do "Persuasion" and "Mansfield Park" then one could have an entire Jane Austen movie collection that are almost equal to her novels.

There is hope...

~Lizzie