Libraries, and How They Work

For the average person: Library use is simple. Once a week, or maybe once every two weeks if you’re a remarkably slow reader, you go to the library and get the next poorly written, ½ inch thick novel of your chosen genre. Perhaps a slimy romance, action flick or sci-fi, it really doesn’t matter. You read it (amazingly enough, since an American who doesn’t watch TV in every spare moment is rare) and return it in a timely manner. No pesky announcements about how much money you currently owe to the poor library system when you try to check out your next cheap novel masquerading as literature. No sheepish feeling as you realize that you kept a copy of one of the most ridiculously over-used plot-lines past your allotted three weeks and probably deprived 2 other people of the mind-numbing blandness contained in those tortured pages. Lighthearted and carefree, you skip home to enjoy your next piece of cotton-candy reading.


For the serious reader: Library use is difficult. First of all, they don’t have half of the books you want to read at your branch, and you have to request them. Once your book of real literature written before the days of TV and dumbed down Americans arrives, you take it home and dive in. The only problem is, no matter how fast a reader you are, you really can’t finish an unabridged version of The Count of Monte Cristo in less than three weeks, unless you have absolutely nothing better to do than read all day long. So the appointed due date arrives, and you try to take advantage of this convenience called “renewal.”


Can I side track for a moment? Why do they give you a due date and fines if you’re also allowed to just renew the book? Think about that as I proceed.


So you’re trying to renew your book. Since you can do that from the comfort of your own home on the internet, you take a moment from reading your wonderful piece of intelligent literature to utilize the library website. But once you click the “renew” button, you get a little red sentence announcing that you can’t renew your book because someone else has requested it! Unlike the average reader of average intelligence might, you don’t sigh and resign yourself to going to the library to return the book before you finish reading it. You resolve to finish as soon as possible, but fines or no fines, you will finish the book. After all, you can’t give up what must be the only library copy of this great work of fiction before you’ve devoured every well-phrased sentence and breathed a sigh of contentment at the satisfactory ending. Somewhere around a dollar into your fine, you start wondering how much you’re going to have to pay. So you get back onto the library website and look up the book in the handy-dandy library catalog. When you check the number of requests, and how many copies of the book are available in the system, you see that there are actually 5 checked in copies of THE EXACT SAME BOOK available to be shipped anywhere that’s desired, and you call the library to complain. “Oh, yes,” the librarian calmly informs you, “the computer program does that for some reason. If you try to renew it now, it will work.” “Great,” you say, “then can you forgive my fine?” “No, I’m sorry,” the librarian says, “I can’t do that.” You bite your tongue, hang up politely and decide that it’s worth it to buy every single piece of literature that you ever want to read in the future. And when you finally finish The Count of Monte Cristo, you go buy a copy of it, because it was just that good.

Shocking and Malicious Distortion of Classic Literature #2

Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters. Oh, creatures of the deep, slay me before I read the first word and save me from my misery.

Oh, wait. I don't have to read it! Never mind.

There should be a law against tacking Jane Austen's name onto any contortion of her writing.

All that is needed now is a very elaborate eye-roll and a disgusted sigh.

~Lizzie

On my schedule this year...

Monday: piano lesson and student-teaching/assisting with some younger students

Tuesday: Swimming, Broadway Dance and Theatre class.

Wednesday: Swimming, water polo, possibly Adv. Acting (not decided yet) and Radical Wednesday (Wednesday night church meeting).

Thursday: Swimming

Friday: Teaching my own piano students.

Throw in school, and my siblings' activities like band, basketball and baseball and it makes for a fuller schedule than it appears.

For my "super" senior year, I'm doing business math, Human Biology, Spanish (still...) and an assortment of history, writing and literature books. For the first time, I get to choose what I'd like to do, instead of what I need to graduate! The beginning of school is always exciting, with new books and the prospect of interesting things to learn, but the excitement usually fades very quickly for me. This year I anticipate enjoying my "school" work much more. Mostly because I don't feel like it IS school, since I'm learning things that will be useful and interesting for me!

Along with school-type books, I've also selected several books on Christianity, health, etc. to read as a part of school this year... an idea that I got from Meredith. =) I began with Stepping Heavenward on Sunday, and finished it Monday in the car as we drove to Wilmington to visit my Nana. I've never been able to read in the car without feeling sick before, so I've either outgrown it, or the book was just so engrossing that I didn't feel sick... whatever is was, I REALLY enjoyed Stepping Heavenward!

I'm also adjusting my sleeping schedule so that I go to bed earlier, and get up earlier. When I was younger I didn't understand why "early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise," but now I realize that you get so much more productive work done when you get up early. It truly gives you more DAY time, and as my late evenings are usually spent in some unproductive activity like TV or computer, I think rising early is an important habit for me to form. It is also healthier, because 10pm-2am are the best hours of sleep, and if you get those hours of sleep you can spend less time sleeping, but still wake up feeling refreshed and energized.

I'm so excited about everything this school year may hold!

~Lizzie

Humph.

Well, I had something I was going to write about. And I can't remember what it was, and I asked Sarah (because she was there when I decided to write about whatever it was) and she said that she can't remember either, but whatever it was, it was boring. *pouts*

Ah! I just thought of something to rant about. First, look at this link (Warning: creepy and gross): Link... Have you looked? Don't read on until you looked and really studied the picture. And read the description. That's important too. If you're still reading and you thought you could get away without looking at the article, you were wrong!

Okay, everyone read it now? And looked at the picture? Good.

Oh, MY, GOSH!!!! That has GOT to be the WORST book to ever be written! Quick, enjoy the last month and a half before publication, when life as we know it will suddenly become 10 times worse! AHHHHH!!!!! It's sacrilege! It's indescribably awful! How can you combine ZOMBIES, of all the most childish, stupid, horrific and idiotic fantastical creatures, with something as classic, genteel, well-written and beyond amazing as Pride and Prejudice? It's malicious! Ooooh. *shudders*

I'm so disgusted.

~Lizzie

Mansfield Park...s. All of them.

I have now seen all three versions of Mansfield Park, and having also read the book, I am qualified in my opinion of the book having never been done anything close to justice in movie form. The version that came closest is fairly old, with bad coloring, horribly unattractive characters and a Fanny that rather annoyed me. Then there was the newest version aired on TV with slightly more attractive actors and actresses, but not as close to the book as the old version (which, despite it's other faults, was certainly diligent in following Jane Austen's storyline). And then there's the version we just watched tonight. Besides the fact that I have a lingering annoyance for Frances O'Connor from her performance in "The Importance of Being Earnest," the screen writer managed to mutilate Fanny's character enough by herself. Not to mention obviously being a feminist and mutilating the entire movie.

I wish Andrew Davies would do a Mansfield Park. He's done my favorite versions of "Sense and Sensibility," and "Pride and Prejudice," and I really liked "Northanger Abbey," "Bleak House," "Wives and Daughters," and "Emma." (Although my favorite version of "Emma" is still the one with Gwyneth Paltrow.) If only he would do "Persuasion" and "Mansfield Park" then one could have an entire Jane Austen movie collection that are almost equal to her novels.

There is hope...

~Lizzie

Elsie Dinsmore

The Elsie Dinsmore books by Martha Finley were very popular amongst Christian homeschool girls back when I was younger. I even knew a guy who read them. I've read them several times over the course of my life, and my impressions each time were very interesting.

The first time I read them I was 8. I thought Elsie was amazingly perfect. The way all the "good" people treated each other was sickeningly sweet, and the "bad" people weren't too awful. They actually came up with some pretty funny remarks.

The next time I was about 10. I noticed that Elsie actually wasn't perfect; there were at the most, two instances where she was slightly less than perfect. Their interaction with each other were still so sweet as to be sickening, but the "bad" people seemed worse.

I read them again when I was 14. By this time I realized that Elsie definitely wasn't perfect, but still close enough as to put me to shame. Strangely, the the over-use of "dearest" and "darling" in conversations was only becoming more unpleasant for me, even as I realized that Elsie wasn't as good as I'd originally thought, and that the "wicked" relatives were worse than I'd previously thought.

I thought when I'd read them at 14 that I'd probably already changed my opinion as much as I ever would, but I just began reading them again this week, and my opinions have continued to change. Elsie, far from being perfect, really has some pretty petty and childish moments. She and her father are very prejudiced against the "lower class," and while they are kind, they avoid contact unless to preach the gospel. This is particularly annoying to me as I would qualify as the lower class in their million-dollar world. Their frequent use of endearments annoys me even more than it did 3 years ago.

Besides that, their slaves do everything for them, and in one book Elsie admits that she's never so much as put on her own shoes and stockings, and they proclaim themselves tired after something as ridiculous as a carriage ride! And Elsie, as a grown woman, is requested by her father that she not carry her own child! A baby! And I know many 9-10 year old girls who quite frequently carry 2-year-old's with little difficulty. They are pathetically weak, susceptible to disease, and, dare I say, lazy!

The final straw has been this fourth book. Perhaps I will be able to recover some of my former interest in these books, but right now my Southern pride is aroused. They are supposed to be southerners, but they hide in England for the duration of the Civil War, chiding the South for attempting to succeed, from across the Atlantic Ocean. The Civil War was, as some people don't know, actually over state's rights. The federal government was becoming too powerful, so some Southern states decided to leave the Union. I wish the South had won, I think our country would be in a much better position today if they had. I'm completely disgusted with Martha Finley for creating such awful characters.

I can't read them any more. I wish I'd left the Elsie Dinsmore books as a pleasant childhood memory. Perhaps I can erase my memory of this reading and remember it as I did: a fairy-tale story of a little girl too perfect to be real.

~Lizzie

Painfully slow.

I recently heard "Stand" by Rascall Flatts... it's an okay song, but I really like the line "life's like a novel with the end ripped out." It's such a good analogy, it makes me laugh.

I'm a really fast reader. Or so I'm told. I've never been able to devour good books as fast as I would like for myself. After I realized that life really is like a novel with the end ripped out, I also realized why I wish my life would go just a little faster. It's not that I mind living it this slow, as a matter of fact, I wish I could live it a little slower. But I do wish that I could read it faster. It feels like, at the end of every day, I open the book of my life and watch an invisible pen write one sentence in an excruciatingly careful hand. And I read that one sentence over and over. It doesn't take long to memorize it. And the next day I wake up and live another sentence. For me, this is torture. I'm so interested in how my story turns out! My life is a book that I would stay up all night to finish, but I don't have that option. I guess that's actually a good thing though, because it probably wouldn't be as much fun to live it if you'd already read the entire story.

Actually, now that I think about it, I probably don't truly want to read it. I'd rather not know about the bad things ahead of time. But I do wish I could know a little about the good things... Ah, well. I'm off to start another line of my life.

~Lizzie

Do Hard Things

Alex and Brett Harris's new book, entitled "Do Hard Things" arrived in the mail today. I eagerly began devouring it, and it wasn't long before I got one of my intense revelations. Okay, so it wasn't really intense. But it is kinda disturbing.. to me anyway.

Just in case you don't know who Alex and Brett Harris are, and maybe the book title is giving you ideas of hanging by your toes or drinking a gallon of mud, let me give you some background. (You can also check out their blog The Rebelution.) Alex and Brett Harris are twin younger brothers of Joshua Harris, the author of "I Kissed Dating Goodbye," "Boy Meets Girl" and other such helpful books. As explained much more eloquently on their blog, they discovered some very interesting ideas about those of us who are commonly called "teenagers."

Our culture today expects very little good of us. Most teenagers are expected to be irresponsible and childish, interested only in having fun. We are completely capable of behaving like the adults that we physically are, but we don't. Why? That brings me to my point. Ready? No....? Seriously? Whatever.. I don't care if you're ready or not!

We live up to what is expected of us.

Really, we do. Fortunately, most of us who are home-schooled have diligent parents who DO expect us to behave like adults. Or at least better than the average American teenager. But I've sidetracked from my point. .... what was my point? Oh, yes.

My revelation. My expectations for myself have dropped sadly in this past year. And actually, (not to try to place the blame on someone else, but....) I think it's mostly due to the Chemistry class that I've been in this year. The whole class started off with fairly good grades, if I remember correctly. But somehow we've slacked off terribly. All of the tests for the rest of the year are going to be open-book. I'm not trying to brag about my grades or anything, but I've never ever gotten a 76 before that I remember..... and I got a 76 on AN OPEN-BOOK TEST. Don't tell me that isn't pathetic. That is so far beyond pathetic that I can't even find a word to describe it.

I'm not blaming it on the teacher. It's really my fault, I'm certainly capable of getting just as good grades without him expecting it of me. I just haven't been expecting it of myself. I even stopped doing the homework. We have class tomorrow, and even now, with almost all of the homework still left to do, I'm writing a blog post about how low my expectations of myself are. No kidding.

And not only have I slacked off my Chemistry, I've slacked off almost everything else. My piano practicing has completely died. I haven't practiced AT ALL in nearly 3 weeks. I did worse than I've ever done before in my piano competitions this past winter. My math grades have been sloping almost as bad as Chemistry. My room (which I'd actually been keeping clean!) has gone back to the mess that it's been for most of my life. I've been staying up late, and sleeping in to disgraceful hours. I have a script that was supposed to be memorized before Christmas break and I've memorized a grand total of one scene. It's all my fault. I AM capable of doing things that aren't expected of me, but naturally it's so much easier if they are expected of you.

So, "Do Hard Things" has nothing to do with unnecessary pain or stupidity, but everything to do with requiring of yourself things that are hard, but beneficial. Like it's going to be really hard for me to drag my grades back up, practice piano, go to bed early and get up early, memorize my script, keep my room clean, and various other things that I need to do. But I'm going to do them, and proudly be one of the "teenagers" rebelling against the low expectations of our society. And I honestly can't believe how sad my list sounds.... I should already be doing all those things, and not thinking twice about it! Man, I have sooooo much work to do.

And just so all of y'all know, I refuse to be called a teenager. *shudder* What a degrading term....

~Lizzie

Amazingly enough.

The snake that was under our piano came out this morning. He must have been really hungry. Anyway, we caught him and dumped him in the woods outside. I can't believe he was in our living room for 9 days! I really thought he was dead.

Except for that slightly disturbing occurrence today was exactly the kind of not-rushed and lazy fun that every Saturday should be. I didn't really enjoy the rain however, even though I'm glad we're getting it. I didn't get up til 9, Sarah and I dropped Joel off at baseball practice and then went shopping. We got back to pick him up, watched a practice game in the rain (I got wet.... and cold..) and went home, had lunch, went to Comedy Cafe, came home, watched The Transporter and now I'm going to read Emma.

I'm sure you were all desperate to know how my day was. Unfortunately, I can't think of anything more interesting to write about, so that'll have to be it for now.

~Lizzie

The most awesomest books ever!!

So, I finished the fourth book last night. It's still awesome. It's always been awesome. I don't really get what's wrong with Lizzie... she's never really liked fantasies all that much... HAHA!!! I got her!! she has been tricked. *evil grin*
I can't wait for the 5th book!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's gonna be here in April I think. SO cool!!! *ahem*

I just got back from the orthodontist, and I already hate my retainers. They feel really big, they hurt, the wire on the top keeps sliding up and they taste horrible.
I did end up with a black case though! :D I really like the blue color too...

In a surprisingly good mood.
--Sarah

The Most Horrible Book Ever.

I finished the first book in the series that Sarah tricked me into reading (The Binding of the Blade). I hated it. With a passion. It was THE most devastatingly awful book I've ever read. I actually hate it more than I hate Pirates 2 & 3, and that's really saying something.


HUGE SPOILER WARNING: Only read if you don't ever want to read the books. (Highlight to read.)


The main character actually dies at the end of the book. He's murdered by one of his "friends" because he married the girl that his friend wanted. It was the most retarded tear-jerker book I've ever read.

END SPOILER.

I refuse to read the rest of the series. And now I'm going to mentally edit the story so that it goes the way I wanted it to. And then I'm going to forget about it.


Disgusted,

~Lizzie

First post!!

So, my first post. I would like, introduce myself, or something, but that's kinda what my profile's for... isn't it?
Anyway...
I'm getting my braces off tomorrow. Actually, I got most of them off two weeks ago, but they left four on on the top. So, I'm getting the rest off tomorrow, and also getting my retainer. I would've liked it to be silver, with a black case, but that wasn't a choice. So I got clear blue, which means I'll probably get a blue case too. It's just so normal... Oh well, I like blue... probably too much...

I'm reading this extremely cool fantasy series right now. It's got alot of stuff in it that reminds me of The Lord of the Rings. It's original though, unlike Eragon, in which everything is taken from LotR, Starwars or some "Dragon Rider" series I've never read.
Anyway, the series I'm reading is called The Binding of the Blade, and it's by L. B. Graham. I think the reason I like it so much is 'cause of how unpredictable it is. I love the end of the first book; it's sooo perfectly unpredictable!!
Graham's writing style is really neat. The books have a modern feel, even though they're set in the traditional medieval fantasy time.
Sadly, I can't ramble on about it too much 'cause Lizzie hasn't even finished the first book yet. I'm in the fourth one. Maybe I'll be able to finish it today!

--Sarah